The Pinnacle of your Pleasure is Spiritual

Following post is conributed by our guest blogger Neeharika

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What on this good earth does an orgasm have to do with spirituality? Isn’t the idea that orgasms can lead to expanded consciousness, healing and spiritual evolution just a wee bit far fetched?

I am here to tell you that it is not at all that far fetched. Women are capable of having up to 7 different types of orgasms!

It’s a divinely delicious skill that all women have available to them.

Why is it that out of all the potential different orgasms that we can have, we resort to having one of the most common and feeble orgasms? If we have any at all! Because let’s face it, not all of us are dipping into our wells of divine pleasure.

Lack of Education and Interest

The first thing I discovered when I started practising sexual tantra, was that I didn’t know my intimate bits at all as well as I should have.

I was aware of one or maybe two orgasms: Clitoral and G-Spot. The clitoris was an easy one to pinpoint but anything happening inside my yoni (vagina) was a complete mystery! Many women relate to their vaginas like they were cities in China, never tapping into the magic they carry inside of them.

I didn’t have an instruction manual to show me the different orgasmic points I had available to me. To be quite honest, I also didn’t bother to find out for myself because sex was mostly my husband’s interest and instigation.

The common complaint in most couples is that “she is never interested” and “he is overly interested”.

I think the main reason for a lack of interest in sex from women comes down to a lack of education and experience. When we don’t know that there is more to orgasming than stimulating the clitoris, and we when we don’t know how to troubleshoot our way towards a smoother and pleasurable orgasmic experience … Well, then how are we ever going to experience earth-shattering pleasure?

Of course, there are many other reasons that promote a lack of interest in sex such as trauma or fear of intimacy.

Pleasure/Performance Pressure

Some men have a tendency to ejaculate within or under 7 minutes. It takes a woman 20 minutes or more just to warm up! Her first orgasm can come anywhere from 30 minutes to much further into the lovemaking session. I’m not talking about you ladies who are able to orgasm from the moment your beau touches you until you fall asleep! In general, it takes longer for women to reach orgasm than it does men.

From my own past experiences and from the countless stories that I’ve heard from other women, there is nothing more frustrating than putting out and not getting anything back in return.

Because of this many women feel extra pressure to perform and race towards the slightest glimpse of orgasmic pleasure … anything will do!

The quickest and easiest orgasm that most women have comes from clitoral stimulation. If we do not have the skill to sublime the potent life-supporting energy that comes from this type of orgasm, it becomes the nemesis in developing our full feminine potential.

Fear of Intimacy

Having quick and explosive orgasms doesn’t help the cause in cultivating a deeper connection with our partner or our Self.

My husband has always been a sensual and generous lover. The sexual chemistry between us has always been compelling. But, like most long term relationships, we too have hit our bumps in the road where it comes to frequency and quality of lovemaking.

The victory of any couple relationship is reliant on the dissolution of the ego and the unveiling of the true Self.

Every time we make love with our partners we give and take the perfect opportunity to reveal and witness the Self.

When I realised how ignorant I had been with regards to my full orgasmic potential, it dawned on me that I was holding back on intimacy. I was holding back on discovering who I really was. I was holding back on showing my husband the truth of my being. I was so busy holding on to fear and control that I couldn’t surrender. Without my complete surrender, I could not allow complete intimacy … I couldn’t let my husband in.

The Spiritual Connection

I’ve had enough mystical experiences through sex and orgasm to know the healing abilities and how it connects to the Divine … especially when we consciously direct our attention to God.

A few years ago I was going through a rough time. Everything was collapsing mentally, emotionally, physically. I was exhausted from holding on to control and hurt, the past, the future, self-limiting ideas and bad habits.

After spending a week apart from my husband I longed to see and feel him again. Intuitively I knew that his good and deep loving would make me feel better. Before we made love I told him not to worry if I cry or speak or make different sounds, to just go with it …. that there was something deep deep deep inside that needed to be touched. It was like I had a fever … I just surrendered, the orgasm took soooooo long (which at that time I didn’t like) and I just gave up on focussing on that and started praying to God to please just help me and take me and make me better … my eyes were closed but looking up … everything up … face, chest, back arched and focussed on God …. and then it came … I was lifted up into His arms … high … elevated … I could breathe … I could let go of control … I was safe, I was better, I was whole.

That was my first experience of a Tantric orgasm consecrated to healing and spiritual liberation.

The biggest thing that opened me to my orgasmic potential was a shift in the way I looked at sex. Before it was about control, sense gratification, and a tit-for-tat. Now it is about surrendering, healing and connecting to Self in the most sublime and meditative way.

Sexuality is such an intricate part of our day-to-day lives. It is possible to elevate this experience and use it as a tool to cultivate a life of abundance and love.

It is through embracing our existence and the power we hold within us that we align ourselves with dharma, a natural way that supports life, spirit and evolution.